up the lithe neck,
the sounds of
Filling the room
that invites one
up the lithe neck,
the sounds of
Filling the room
that invites one
You know the type. Even though he cheats on her….even though he bashes her behind her back…even though he is a serial liar, she clings to him, because she can’t live without a man to accompany her. Regardless of what he does, she HAS to have a man beside her or she doesn’t feel worthy or complete. She is insecure.
However, if you’re in a relationship with a person who used to make him or her happy and no longer does, what keeps that person there is not love, it’s fear….. so don’t talk to me about being soft-hearted or forgiving, because you’re a fool, if this applies to you, and everyone who knows the two of you also understands this. They just don’t have the heart to tell you.
If he has cheated once, he will do it again…and HAS…and still continues to. You think by staying in an unhappy and unfulfilling relationship you are doing the right thing. You convince yourself that things will get better, that he’ll change and that it’s not that bad, you can live with things the way they are. But the truth is you can’t and you know it. Pegi Young is a woman who has said, “To hell with it…” and has forged a whole new life for herself, despite the public humiliation of her former husband’s infidelities. I admire her for this.
Pegi Young turned that negative experience into a positive one. She turned it into art.
This morning, NPR did a show about how Neil Young had dumped his wife of 36 years for the younger, prettier Daryl Hannah, shown here relaxing in France.
But this story isn’t really about Neil Young. It is about his ex wife, Pegi….the woman who was jilted….because she didn’t ‘just crawl into a hole and go away. She embraced what happened to her in a way that puts Neil to shame. Yes, “the best revenge is living well,” or so they say, and Pegi Young is doing just that.
I’ve heard a lot of people criticize her for putting out this album and drawing attention to herself at “this age” but I love it that she did this. Her album is not necessarily my cup of tea, and I have been a Neil Young fan forever, but I admire Pegi for taking the reigns and being in command of her own destiny regardless of what he did to her. Making this album demonstrated tremendous inner strength, and it doesn’t matter how old she is, what she looks like, how “jilted” she was when she did it. She did it to heal, and I admire her for it.
Her new album is called, “Raw”….and it is. She said that writing the songs that are on it is what got her through, i.e. saved her life. Each of her new songs deals with one of the seven stages of grief. In this song, “Trying to Live my Life Without You,” Pegi wrote, “We regretted the changes that brought us to now. I’d take it all back if I only knew how. You can drive on away with the weight of demand. And the road keeps on going until you find where you land….”
She has made a statement that makes HER look like the better person. She has taken a pile of shit and turned it into gold. I have so much respect for a person who does something like this instead of deciding to wallow in the shit as their lives go by with disrespect from their partners. Pegi Young is a strong woman. A REAL woman, and she has my respect.
Nothing has changed.
John is in Pittsburgh, and I’ve been here enjoying the rain and the fine company of my family and friends. However, I find that I accomplish so much more when I’m by myself. I have been slowly going through the boxes in the garage so I can move them into storage and set up my studio out there. I’m donating more than I’m keeping. Just tired of having so much stuff. Our living room is now crowded with musical instruments…..five guitars, a complete drum kit, two big mic stands, mics, amps, cords everywhere.
I took a break from everything and decided to do a little photography today, so my new camera came out of the box for its first experimental shoot. It is the most complex camera I have ever owned, (Canon EOX 5d Mark IV ) and it will take me months to learn how to use all of its features, but today, I did take a few shots and downloaded them to my computer. I’m on a learning curve, and also spoiled by the ease of use of my old camera. This one does so much, but as of yet, I can only access limited features. I figure I can teach myself a new one each day until I get the hang of it.
I played with lenses…telephoto, macro….and filters. I have my eye on an EF 70-200mm f/4L USM lens for coastal shots, but I have other, more important, priorities right now. The Oregon coast is all kinds of beautiful, but I need that lens to really capture what I see.
It rained today, and I stood in my living room and took a few shots, and some more from my front porch. I loved the way the clouds filtered the light, and felt these were good shooting conditions, so here are some of my first efforts. These are unadulterated raw images and I’m not thrilled with how dark they are, but I’ll learn..
As a closing note, I love this little hummingbird who sits on the very end of one of my rose bush stems and guards the feeder. See how his feathers around his head are warning everyone to stay away, even as he naps? If you have the chance, watch, “Super Hummingbirds,” on PBS. I watched it over the weekend with Ingrid, and we loved it. Truly a fascinating documentary.
Until next time. Hugs to all.
This is, perhaps, one of the most exciting times in my entire life. I am paving the way to begin walking an entirely new path toward new goals and it feels great. I am probably busier than I’ve been since my children were little, but I have stores of energy, and tons of enthusiasm that keep me going each day. I have a supportive partner….two supportive partners, really….and I feel like a million bucks.
One thing that I’m doing that might seem a little wacky for a woman my age, is I’m taking a singing masterclass from Christina Agulara. Yep. You read that correctly.
While I do have a strong singing voice and I do sing, from time to time, I do not aspire to be a famous pop star. Instead, I am taking the class to learn her teaching approach and methods. Virtually everything I do these days is to prepare for my new business, and this is far from all I am doing .
I have found a dedicated business partner who complements those areas that I lack, and I complement hers as well. We are planning our first workshop/retreat for next April, and it is exciting indeed! I’m running around like crazy looking at venues, working on marketing, taking pictures, writing curriculum, developing products, writing …writing…writing…networking…making new business connections.
A lot of my workshops will be centered around music and musicians (as this is an important, special part of my life,) so I am learning the inner bones….the when, where, why and how of the technical aspects. Those things, combined with my background in psychology are what have me so geared up and ready to go with these workshops.
While I do have my masters in psychology, I am now actively working to enhance that with life coaching certification classes from the Integrative Wellness Academy. I feel that the two credentials integrated will help me with my workshops. Should take a few months to earn my certification.
In other news….my songwriting efforts are progressing in leaps and bounds, as is my guitar playing. Taking classes for both. I have really had a breakthrough and feel as though I am soaring. I am so happy. I love my life. Honestly. It is a good life, one that is far from perfect, but that is filled with and operated by love. I could not ask for a better and more supportive family-family AND family of friends. Being confident in my love is a wonderful feeling.
I have signed up for a new yoga program that will also be integrated into our workshops. I am making art by the hour. I am on a roll…..like butta. Man, this is good. I have never felt happier. Love helps. 😉 It is what I live for.
This is six year old, Ingrid. She worked very hard on her impersonation of Sarah Palin. I hope you enjoy it, and that you will share it if you do!
Thanks for watching!
Whoa….It looks like we just may have a new blues hero here! Teen guitarist Chase Walker is being referred to as “the new Stevie Ray Vaughan”, or “the new Kenny Wayne Shepherd.” American Blues Scene calls him one of the top 10 musicians under 18 you should know. After I watched this video I knew why. Wow.
Walker, who is from Riverside, California, was born in 1998 and didn’t start playing guitar until 2010. His influences include Vaughan, Warren Haynes, the Black Crowes and the Black Keys. Since I knew Vaughan a little bit, I’m excited about this.
To quote the Big Bear Grizzly, the Chase Walker Band formed in 2012 and includes Matt Fyke on drums and vocals and Randon Davitt on bass and vocals. In 2013, Walker’s song “Too Many Days Ago” was a finalist in John Lennon International Songwriting Contest.
The band released its debut album, Unleashed, last year.
Here is a little blurb from the new show, “Empowering Women Everywhere, ” which is hosted by my friend, Nann Gill.
Watch it on Channel 23 (TWC) at 7:30 ET, or on line at empoweringwomeneverywhere.tv.
Become part of the Empowering Women Everywhere Community!
Membership is FREE!
Read more about the 2 Left Feet Blues Festival HERE. <clickity click click click….
“Empowering Women Everywhere” is produced by the Academy of Film, Television and Stage Performing Arts, a 501c3 corporation.
The program reaches over a million households twice a week!
For a tax-deductible donation you can become a sponsor of the show.
Sponsorship packages are individually designed to best fit your giving criteria.
Please call 845-294-8444 to discuss your particular requirements.
Life is a balance between holding on and letting go.
Things have changed.
I used to walk into a room and wonder if the people there would like me. Now, when I walk into a room, I wonder if I will like them. The need for external validation is not important to me, at this point in life, and I don’t have to actually like someone for them to have value in my life, nor to have value in theirs. If there is a job to be done, I simply do it. I have optimized, categorized and am moving full speed ahead. I am letting go of the negative and embracing those positive relationships that are good.
The relationships that remain are solid.
I have learned to let go of the people and things that do not serve my best interests…the ones that hurt and deceive me ….and this has really helped me to stay focused and to do good work. This has freed up a tremendous amount of emotional and physical energy. It can be difficult when one lets go of family members or of people who were once close friends…..but as things turn out, letting go of those with whom your values, ethics, morals and beliefs do not align, can help propel you forward and free you to do what you are best suited to do in life.
The people that *really* matter to me are functionally in my life, although I am forced to use that term (“functionally”) loosely when referring to one significant person. That is an unfortunate situation that I cannot talk about here.
The solution was simple. I let go of the drama and embraced all of the many good things that I hold so close to my heart and things have never been better. I now sing about my happiness to other audiences and I go to bed every night with a smile on my face, knowing that I am loved.
My husband has returned to Portland, full time, from the Bay Area and we have immersed ourselves into a plethora of creativity. His health is much better than it was, even a year ago. He attributes this to our being together so much of the time now. I am watchful over is health, feed him good, home-cooked food and make sure he gets lots of exercise. He seems so happy, and I’m glad he is home. He is writing plays and working with a partner on creating original musical scores for his plays. I have the biggest art commission of my life, am working on my novel every day. I have successfully completed the composition of two country and western songs that will soon be ready to shop. I and am putting a new business together and am also spending lots of time with Ingrid in these last days before she is immersed into French school. I am thoroughly enjoying the wonderful city where we live. John and I are reorganizing our home and getting rid of possessions that we no longer need. Everything is about moving ahead and being happy.
Everything that we are doing, together and individually, can be either directly or indirectly attributed to making the best choices about letting go of the dead weight of the crazies. I cannot believe I ever hesitated.
Life is so uncomplicated now. Why didn’t I make these decisions years ago?
I kid you not. I almost fainted when I watched this the first time. It is divine….in every possible way.
This beautiful song by India Arie was performed by Dr. Wayne Dyer’s daughter, Skye, acapella, at the recent “I Am Light” seminar that I attended with my friend, Shannon Kringen, here in Portland. I thought of another of my friends as I listened to these words… and was grateful for his teaching and his loving light. As I listen to this song, I am thankful for the love that I receive each day, and I am reminded again, of how lucky I am. There is only one spirit and one mind, and we are all part of this collective intelligence and love. We are one.
I am spending very little time online these days. Time is fleeting as I count down the days until my final 10 weeks of school work and I am staying quite busy….working, playing, learning…. There are not words sufficient enough to describe how much I needed and am enjoying my current break. My capstone (thesis) course begins on Sunday, but I probably won’t check in and look at it until Monday.
During my break, I have accomplished a lot and have felt joyful and happier than usual, simply because I have so much to feel grateful for …and because I am so close to completing this monumental goal in my life. Things seem to be falling right into place in virtually every area of my life. However, I remain ever-mindful that I could lose it all in an instant. That is the nature of life……so I am enjoying what I have in the moment, and am feeling extraordinarily thankful.
Here are some of the things that make me feel so lucky:
#1. John – My husband is such a good person. He is a genuine blessing in my life. His play writing endeavors are getting a lot of positive attention and reviews. It makes my heart jump with joy to see him thriving in this way. He is happy, so I am happy. That’s how a good marriage works. His job is also going very well. He was just promoted and given a nice raise and a extended contract…AND, he will now be an exclusively online professor, meaning that he can work from anywhere in the world. He will be moving back home to Portland at the end of May, and I couldn’t be more thrilled. We have many adventures planned together. While we have settled into our separate routines in separate cities over the last five-ish years, with him coming home during holidays and over the summer, we have always wanted to be permanently reunited. This will be a dream come true for us both. This will also give me the opportunity to take care of him better…diet, exercise…tender loving care.
#2. Art – I am on a roll with my art, becoming more inspired each day, learning new skills, trying new techniques. Just this morning, I finished a mixed media portrait of my best friend called, “Lightworker”. My head is constantly filled with art. Right now, I am taking one of Deryn Mentock’s fabulous jewelry making classes, but I am also designing a new mosaic fireplace surround for our house, working on a painting, doing a series of guitar-related art, working on a new tee shirt graphic and am generally living the art life. I love it. I set aside a number of hours every evening to focus upon and create new art.
#3. Music – Music, of course, is its own form of art, but I feel it deserves its own category. I am practicing my guitar each day and still taking lessons. Not getting very good, but am learning a lot. The main problem lies in the fact that despite being a keyboardist for the vast majority of my life, I do not have strong hands. I understand how to play guitar perfectly. My fingers, however, struggle. I am, again, taking the Berklee College of Music songwriting course, and I will probably enroll in it again and again. Even though the lessons are the same each session, I learn something new each time.
I am working on writing these country songs that are really coming together! I am also still attending jams on Sunday afternoons/evenings and am becoming deeply immersed into the Portland music scene. I am having fun, meeting a ton of great people and have found yet one more thing to be grateful about.
#4. Friendship – With each passing day, I am more thankful for my best friend and the energy, love and kindness that he bestows upon me. Two peas in a pod, we are, and demonstratively indestructible. He is a gift straight from heaven.
This is real love….real friendship, and I am grateful for it every minute of my life. It has its negative side, as all things do, but since I have learned to ignore that, I am better able to reap the benefits of the positive. I used to take the negative aspects into my heart and allow them to hurt me or worse, allow them to make me angry. Today? I can’t believe I ever allowed them to bother me. The positive is SO good, that it completely cancels out the negative. I simply ignore the fluff and embrace the substance. The love is substantial.
In addition to my bestie, I have other friends that enrich my life every day that I live it. My friends are exceptional people, individuals from whom I continue to laugh with and learn from. I am so fortunate to have these awesome, intelligent, remarkable people in my life. What a gift!
#5. Organization – I am becoming remarkably organized, purging things from my life, becoming more minimalist, materially, and less dependent on STUFF, as I become more dependent on living a rich, full and active life. I am sorting, adding shelves, tossing things out, donating things and really taking a new perspective on every THING that I own. Stuff is simply not that important to me any more. I find it easier and easier to let go.
#6. Adventure – I am trying new things a lot…going places I’ve never been, re-examining things that are familiar to me and seeing them through more appreciative eyes. I am studying things more….nutrition, geography, philosophy….and taking on new perspectives about virtually everything. I love trying new things and learning lessons about them.
#7. Simplicity – This one fits in closely with my binge toward organization. I am learning to simplify…physically, emotionally and in every way. If something is not working in my life, I have learned to simply move on with no regrets. This happened with a couple of members of my family that simply could not be happy with anything I did in my life. Therefore, I simply let them go and moved on happily, with no regrets and no negativity. It’s funny. I have let go of family members, but have not had to let go of any friends….but I will, if I need to. I just haven’t needed to. My friendships remain positive, probably because of the old adage that you can choose your friends, but not your family.
#8. Family – This is another category that should go higher on this list, in terms of priority…but I’m not writing these things in order of importance. I am writing them as I think of them. My family has taken some dramatic shifts over the last few years. I have grown very close to my mother and father.
I have grown closer to my cousins and have an Auntie that I feel very close to and thankful for. I have a new daughter-in-law with whom I am very close, and a new grandchild who delights me with each encounter. I love and appreciate my family here in Portland, and thrive on my encounters with little Ingrid. I have grown closer to my granddaughter, Maya, and embrace the idea that she will soon live here in the Pacific NW again. I admire her sense of adventure and love it that she is not afraid to make drastic changes and try new things. She is an adventurer of whom I am quite proud! I am one lucky woman and I know it! Exceptional bunch of people, my family…..at least some of them. 😉
#9. Finances – I am learning more and more about business, about how to manifest money….about how to work the system to my advantage so that I might help others. I’ve learned to make lists and to prioritize. It gives me such pleasure to share what I have and to make other people’s lives easier. Using my financial prowess to do good in the world is my ultimate goal. So far, so good.
#10 – LIFE – Life, in general, is good, but I never take it for granted. Rather than fear the future, I am grateful for what I have in the moment. I know there will be losses eventually, but I prefer not to focus on that and, instead, really live the life that I have, while I can, and to do as much as I possibly can with a big smile on my face. Life IS good!
This has been a day filled with many blessings. So many friends and family members have reached out to me in kindness today. I am so grateful for each and every one of them. So grateful. I am especially grateful to my husband, John, and to my best friend. They were the ones that held me up when I didn’t think I could go on, the ones that stood by me every step of the way, and the ones that gave me hope when I just couldn’t find it within myself to go on with this for another day.
I have now officially completed my coursework at Southern New Hampshire University! I completed my final project, my discussion questions and all other required work and I never have to take another class as long as I live….but, of course, I will. I will always take classes of one type or another. That’s just what I do. I still have to complete the 10-week capstone (thesis) project, but I don’t have to take any more courses.
So….I got a big surprise when I posted on my Facebook that I had just finished my work. Independent Music Award winner, Amy Correia posted a sweet congratulations and the above photo of herself with the mosaic guitar that I made for her! Beside the picture, she wrote, “Congratulations! I think of you often : ) And this wonderful gift you made me: I’ll always cherish it!”
This is a better photo of the mosaic guitar that I made for Amy:
While signed to Virgin Records, Amy recorded an album of songs at Daniel Lanois‘ Kingsway Studios in New Orleans with Christopher Thorn producing, but the album went unfinished. Correia left Virgin with her master recordings and signed with Capitol/EMI, which released her debut “Carnival Love” in 2000. Correia recorded the album “Lakeville” with her own money. It was produced by Mark Howard, who also has produced Willie Nelson and Lucinda Williams. The Canadian label, Nettwerk, licensed and released it in 2004.
She tours throughout the U.S. and has performed with artists including Marc Cohn, Richard Thompson, John Hiatt, Freedy Johnston, Emmylou Harris, Jason Crigler, Rebecca Martin, Josh Rouse, Duncan Sheik, Norah Jones, Bonnie Raitt, Richard Julian, Jesse Harris, Ollabelle, Aimee Mann, Kenny White, Jonathon Spottiswoode, Everclear, The Dandy Warhols, Allison Moorer, Tara McLean, Kendall Payne, Shannon McNally, Charlie Musselwhite, Jon Brion, Grant Lee Phillips, Dredd Scott, Julia Fordham, Jess Klein, Kerri Powers and others. I am very proud to call her my friend!
Here are a few videos of Amy singing:
This is my very favorite song by Amy. She is an amazing poet!
This is also one of my favorites:
This is a newer song:
Something remarkable happened yesterday….At least, to ME, it was remarkable.
Years ago, my British friend had a membership to the Foundation Room (shown above) in New Orleans. This is the exclusive “back room” at the House of Blues where we would go to hang out with her friends and, often the band members that played there. It seemed that a lot of rock stars’ wives and girlfriends would hang out in the Foundation Room when they went on tour with their significant others, so sometimes, we would hang with them. My friend knew a lot of them, and I knew some of them, so between us, it seemed we were always surrounded by interesting people there.
I recall one night when a very famous British rock musician played. (You will understand shortly why I don’t want to mention his name.) He was headliner for a band that topped the charts for many, many years and subsequently became as successful as a solo musician. He is noted today as one of the most innovative guitarists in the world. His brother played in the band as well, and has also become a successful solo artist, but at that point, I had not met him.
We sat around a big table that night and discussed liberal politics and philosophy. It was a bold and enthusiastic discussion, full of laughter, dry wit and intelligence. I was titillated by the discussion much more than I was by the fact that this rock idol was sitting right next to me. Because of my work, I had been around enough famous people by that time that I was no longer star-struck, and I have never been impressed by anyone just because they happen to play music.
This man was absolutely brilliant, but he drank too much. (I think K. and I were the only people in the entire room that were not inebriated. Even when in New Orleans, I don’t drink much.) After that event, K. and I, and a couple of the musician’s friends, were invited to get into his limo with him where were driven to a second club. Another great discussion ensued with some other musician friends of his. Very nice group of people. We danced a little, but talked, way into the wee hours of the dawn. It was a great evening.
So….fast forward to present times….
Awhile back, a musician friend introduced me to the aforementioned famous musician’s brother, also a former member of the same band, and also now turned solo artist. We added one another on Facebook. I followed his music and career and politics on Facebook, but had never really interacted with him….until yesterday.
Yesterday, I logged into Facebook and had received a private message from the aforementioned famous brother. “I dig your politics,” he said. “You are a very intelligent woman!” I jotted a quick note of thanks, referred him to some political websites that I enjoy and thought that would be the end of it…but it wasn’t. He responded….and we began a back-and-forth exchange. We talked about an article that I shared with him about an African tribe that claims to be musically influenced by his former rock band. We talked about where we live and what we enjoy in life. We had a long discussion about Texas and its blend of backward fundamentalist rednecks amongst pockets of intelligent people. We talked about mullets. We talked about animals. We talked about A LOT of things…and the chat was long and funny and really nice.
The topic of music came up, and I asked him if he knew my friend of 30+ years, Arthur Brown, who had the 1968 hit record, “I Am the God of Hellfire”. “I LOVE that song,” was his reply…so I posted a video of it on my Facebook. He responded there by joking, “I hope FB and YouTube get hit by a 10 billion dollar copyright infringement suit from PRS et al“.” Funny guy.
It had been awhile since I’d had a chat of that caliber with anyone that smart, let alone famous. I enjoyed it thoroughly. When I signed on to Facebook this morning, there was another note from him saying how much he had enjoyed the chat as well. “Keep in touch,” he said.
I told my husband about this encounter this morning. “I’ve always loved those guys!” he said.
“Yeah….you and the rest of the world.” I said.
These times make me smile.