My father is dying. I am trying to brace myself for that which is to come. The heartache is immeasurable.
He is a good man.
I spend all of my energy sending him love and light and kindness. I ask the nurses to hold the phone to his ear so I can tell him that I love him. I break into tears, then pull myself together, because I know that is what he would want. I work hard because I know that is what he would also want. He is a good man. I ask the nurses to please be kind to him.
I’ve been writing myself notes while he is still alive. Today’s says, “I spoke to Dad today. As I write this, my precious father lay dying. This is in my mind every minute.
He is still alive. I will keep this note forever. It was written while he was still alive. January 22, 2019″.
I am afraid. I don’t know what the world will be like without knowing he is there.
The heartache is immeasurable.
He is a good, good man. I love him.